There are days I wish to call my dad and just cry over the phone. I hold back because a parent is only as happy as their saddest child. It’s not easy for them either that we are so far away and you are never too sure if the ‘I’m fine’ is really well meaning or just a routine reply. They won’t tell us if they are not well either because they do not want to worry us. It’s how humans take care of each other sometimes. Hold back expressing your struggles so it does not add to the burden those who love you carry. Of talking about bad days so that people feel you are human too, will be topic for another day. Right now I’m not about to hold back a single emotive opinion. So swallow or spit it, point is, I’ll have fed it to you already.
I never have tummy issues but Social Media has consistently managed to keep my nausea at bay. Everyone going on up there with an opinion and they feel they are self declared professionals in whatever fields they deem necessarily serious. Everyone has an opinion about everyone else and what everyone else should do. News flash darling, your opinion on these social sites count for nothing if you do not do anything past the keyboard.
So over the past week the most ranted about posts were the man who bragged about raping a lady he bought drinks, I did not quite follow up; and a post about abortion and policies surrounding it.
The man who came on up on social media to brag about rape, girls ranted and some men defended the ‘nothing is free’ ideology all through the comments thread. It was a back and forth of wokeness and consent conversations. As I scrolled through I wondered what does it help to come on facebook and rant. I could give it 24 hours or less before another similar incident occurs again.
Like the marital violence we’ve had to deal with on news bulletins every single day. Today it’s Mwende and social media goes wild and 2 days later it’s Atieno and we are up in keyboard arms again. The dust has not settled a 2nd Mwende is up on TV again. Same darn thing, not a twist to the script. What’s the keyboard really helping with? If I’m wrong let me know, but it feels like a battle of people who feel entitled to their opinions being facts because of the privilege of having gone to school. Who can assess the situation better, who can pull up the biggest word in the dictionary, who can win this debate???
The man who rapes and brags about it, comes from a place where he sees completely nothing wrong with what he has done. He is entitled to what he wants from a woman because he bought her something. No amount of bile you spit will change his mentality. Do you know what is even more interesting is that, there is a whole bunch of him everywhere. If you grew up your entire life, your grand father, father and better yet the society peddled the idea of entitlement to a woman, tell me how you’ll get to the ripe age of 30 and reason any different. See what though, this man knows people get away with this shit, he even feels so entitled that he can do it and come rub it in your faces. Exactly what people you elected are doing because ‘utado?’ It would just be better if you got a rapist and it is proven they did it, like this guy whose own posts on social media incriminate him, stone a ninja, I mean mob justice. The justice system in this country can never let me advice anyone to turn in anyone to the police.
Pedophiles too I recommend mob justice but not until death. They should be left with the slightest bit of life and then simply tortured until they meet their grim reaper a few days later. If you think people who rape kids deserve rights, human rights ni wewe. See what though, that’s my opinion and it will probably not happen. Not while parents accept goats from rapists and chiefs tell parents and rapists to greet and reconcile. It won’t happen in a world where a friend got raped when they were barely 10 and that cousin is now living happily with his wife and kids and your friend is even invited to the wedding. It won’t happen where a rapist is arrested and 3 days later they are roaming these streets because ‘lack of evidence.’ See, what exactly does my opinion help with?
I might be getting a little too upset on that rapists note so lets move on to abortion and those who have decided to have opinions on the same. I have seen the argument why policies are being structured about a woman’s body without her opinion. I think that point makes sense. Men have even refused to just check their HIV status. Something voluntary but feel the need to talk about what a woman should and shouldn’t do. Male contraceptives were introduced sometime recently all men almost packed their bags to move to mars but still have the audacity to have a say for what a woman should want.
So after reading opinions and more opinions I just need to tell you one thing. If I find out I am pregnant today in the confines of my house and I decide I don’t want to keep it, I will terminate it. Whether I decide to tell the father or not will not one bit rely on how loud your social media posts are. Every single person and relationship is independent and we are all unique individual personalities so enough with comparisons. You have no idea the arrangements people have, how they function in their relations and what their plans are so you can’t just wake up and cover people with your unsolicited blanket opinion. If your girlfriend would want to consult you for the final decision, do not impose that on every other relationship you want to give your not asked for advice to.
I tell parents and people who condemn abortion so strongly, that it happens and your daughter or girlfriend might have possibly have aborted at some point and they are actually fine. You will never know until you are told and then your attitude suddenly changes. No one comes out to confess in public but I recently heard 1 out of every 4 women have had an abortion. So instead of coming to loud mouth on behalf of god and your ancestral spirits, can you try and ensure that a woman you know who wants to terminate a pregnancy can find you a safe friend to confide in and if their mind is made up a safe way to terminate would be great.
Your stigma is what pushes people to consult quacks who end up destroying more than we can fix. Your social media bile does not help darling. It just creates threads for arguments when the real issues are at someone’s house or in someone’s relationship. It’s like, you remember sex before marriage? We advocated for abstinence so much we did not care for those who did not abstain but now that you can’t avoid it, everyone’s having sex out of wedlock. What was the solution? Why don’t we push for safe sex instead, so that whether you choose to abstain or not, you are safe either way. Isn’t that brilliant?
As for abortion, why don’t we talk of contraceptives? In the case a contraceptive fails and they choose to not have the baby because they are not ready, why don’t we have the option of Safe Abortion? So that at the end of the day we are not enriching quacks and and pushing women to the verge of eternal guilt and death.
For those who care to learn, Safe Abortion has three phases.
- Pre-Abortion Counselling. In this stage the woman goes through a series of therapeutic counselling usually with someone they trust. The spouse, mother, friend or sibling. In this stage the medical practitioner and the lady and her support friend get to analyse the situation, reasons for termination consideration, advise of what to do if they keep it and how to deal with people’s opinion on this topic. In most cases most women after careful analysis usually decide to keep the baby.
- Termination of Pregnancy. If after PAC the lady still wants to proceed with termination. The Doctor will place them under medication and do the necessary termination procedures. She will be constantly monitored and placed on a recommended contraceptive and after drugs until she is as good as new.
- Post Abortion Care. Counseling is conducted again mainly on how to maintain the recommended contraceptive. Check ups to ensure her body is fine. And advice on how to deal with guilt or depression that might come as a result of societal opinion or practices. Even what to eat and do to regain normal body functioning.
That lady is a good as new and the procedure does not interfere with future pregnancies. Note that in the case of safe abortions; the Doctor will advise on whether or not the termination is safe. A quack however will always say what ever you ask is possible.
So as you go around to mouth your opinions again.What is it you do offline that makes what you are busy shouting about online any different? Thank you, stay wise but to learn more you have to learn to stay silent too and observe. Political Correctness never earned anyone a medal.
You can use social media to push for public opinion you feel can change policies. Use social media to share memes and anything laughter worthy. Use social media to cast your professional net wider. Use social media to troll Arsenal fans…LoL! I had to sneak that in. Just make it another safe space.
This article represents my personal opinion on your personal opinions. Hahaha…it is not sponsored and I am not a professional medical practitioner, so what I have on here is from my little knowledge and research. Do your own research too and consult professionals in relevant fields for better accuracy.