BUY ME WITH CHIPS KUKU?

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I have been silently suffering inside for a while now. Trying to keep up with standards set by this upcoming expensive lot of women. The kind that want coffee dates and Java dinners. As a small town girl, it had never occurred to me that someone could spend 1000 bob on a plate of food. That’s just the pork chops on the plate, this G does not cover the glass of wine or even the juice I took while waiting for the meal. Is witchcraft…haha.

As tough as it is to admit this; I am still the chips kuku girl. A girl growing up in a small town, your dad came home with a black paper bag inside a brown bag of fries and wrapped next  to it in a plain white paper, ‘kuku quater.’ My fren, that is the ultimate definition of getting spoiled; you eat that, you are untouchable(Hahaha). Then there was my mom, with the ‘viazi ziko nyumbani’ (there is potatoes at home) vibe. Chei! Don’t these black parents ever understand that home made junk food never tastes as good as fast food junk food? Lol! Key ingredients mainly made in large scale, and 1.35% hygiene observed.

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We evolved and as teenage kicked in, it was no longer lucrative to have a boy buy a girl chips kuku. I never dated as a teenager so I really can’t remember clearly but it must have evolved to chocolates and other meaningless gifts like necklaces. SMH! Ya’ll were lame though.

Western influence from the movies kicked in stronger and that is how we ended up here. The bottles of wine and dinner worth my rent with uber as a key date ingredient. Don’t get me wrong, I love the glass and definitely the international cuisines, but there are days I’m seated across my date in the dim lit ambiance of an expensive restaurant and silently wishing that we’d have just grabbed fries and chicken and ate at some park somewhere talking meaningless stuff. If it were a boyfriend; can’t we just buy 4 packets of deep fried ‘waru’ (potatoes) and GMO infested chicken and head home and eat in front of the TV? LoL!

Anyway this article is just my way of coming out of the closet as a Chips kuku girl. If it means being cheap, then be it. Some girls will look at me and think, ‘Yaani that guy thinks he can bag with just chips and chicken?’  Yes, chips kuku is a direct ticket to my heart. Shedee Madoh! If it’s that cheap to buy my heart, why am I single? I kinda have specifics though, the masala at Chicken House and the one piece chicken from Chicken Inn. Lol!

Can we please make it clear that chips kuku should not be used as gifts for my birthday and other significant days. The expensive stuff will do too. LoL! Oh and chips, kuku should be topped with a cold Fanta black currant. Just like the good ol’ days.

 

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5 thoughts on “BUY ME WITH CHIPS KUKU?

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  1. Ha ha… Your dad and mine are kin! I never understand eating out; I take forever picking a dish and might end up eating fries which I consider junk. I have a habit of proposing the same restaurant for meet ups because I definitely know the signature meal I eat there.
    In a perfect world, let this man buy raw food so we cook together. If he hates cooking let him slice onions, dice tomatoes and shred the garlic. They’ll get me, straight from my soul!

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    1. Our dads are awesome! LoL! I’d pick home made any day, just that this is not my boyfriend so his or my house is out of bounds. And I also pick the same darn place every time. We should seek intervention. I prefer my date picking the meal coz I’ll flip through that menu 678 times. LMAO!

      Liked by 1 person

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